Sunday, October 02, 2005

My last party in my first job.

My company hosted a party for the whole of my practice on Saturday. I managed to push myself to be there or a number of people would have beaten me up. I not only went, but also stayed till 4 in the morning. Am feeling very bad about leaving this firm. This is my first job, have been with this firm for more than a year. Have made good friends here. Change has never been easy for me. But I guess that its time for me to make a few decisions in life. I need a career, a solid one, not just work.
The party was fun. I was silent most of the night, but it was still fun. It’s nice to be surrounded by the warmth of friendship.
I just about managed to reach the venue to catch a dear friend trying his hand at humor on stage. Now this chap is naturally humorous, but that day, he just could not crack the code. Rest of the show done, we almost pounced at the dinner much before anyone else did & we started with dessert.
Then the lights went off, chairs swept away, music filled the room & then the naach gaana. Raj called each hour to ask if I had a drink or two as I was planning to get drunk that night. But he was so worried that I chucked the idea. Fine, I don’t drink, but I want to get drunk. But when you have someone so worried, it’s not worth it. Few drinks down the throat & people are having fun. The bar closes at 12, as the next day is a 'dry day'. People come to my chair & cutely stock all sorts of drinks there. And then I am supplying it to them for the rest of the night. So I did my own type of bartending for a day.
I was sitting happily with a few friends when the bouncer literally drags me onto the dance floor. Luckily for me, I did not need to dance, as he just kept moving me to the music, pulling me from here to there. So much for dancing, huh! I just about manage to settle down when another friend comes & drags me onto the floor. This time I decide to just move to the music. Not for a long time though. When I come back, an acquaintance tells me that he felt like throwing money on me when he saw me dancing. Now, I was not really impressed, but just about managed to smile.
Time passes, its 3 in the night & my head is splitting & my eyes are burning with the smoke. Just then the DJ announces that this is the last number which will play for 3 min. I am all glad and all when suddenly the panga man arrives & asks me for a dance. Here I must tell you about the panga man. This is the man who interviewed me & who gave me my job. I kinda liked him & we used to have these long interesting conversations on the way to work. I thought he was interesting & was a friend. Now, 2 months ago, thanks to his foolishness I had my first corporate panga. Now, I want to put that incident behind me, but I seriously thought he owed me an explanation because of which I was ignoring him royally. I did not know how to refuse & so went along. Just then the DJ announces his blah blah & ends it with saying "and guys, please practice safe sex, it’s a request". Both of us so damn embarrassed. Anyway, knowing that I am uncomfortable, my friends jump in & move me into their circle. I am breathing again. Soon, the party wraps up & time for me to go home. I already am missing these people. Guess I will never learn to 'move on'. I will always carry a heavy baggage of memories. Guess I like it that way:-)

12 Comments:

Blogger Seema said...

Hi,
Am sure this is not what you are looking for. But if you are seriously looking at stuff,then have a look at http://psychacid.blogspot.com/
He is good.

Monday, October 03, 2005  
Blogger Abhishek Chatterjee said...

carrying memories is good i guess... and one must...just dont let the 'baggage' stop you from making new ones.
Cheers!

Tuesday, October 04, 2005  
Blogger Seema said...

Am learning Abhishek,its just taking too much time.Any suggestions?

Wednesday, October 05, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I’m been trying to wrap my mind around this postmodern indulgence called blogging... surprised at how quickly things have changed. Not long ago we hid our diaries to save our odd experiences from becoming dinner table jokes, we talked to our dear ones in a hushed voice in public to distance the world from something personal, and we took our mom’s advice a bit seriously and rarely chatted with strangers. Well, those were the days before internet and cell phones. How bizarre that we even survived!

Reading your blog makes me ponder over the enticing aspects of blogging: the way you express yourself, the importance you could give to your workaday life, how you realize that your mundane life can be interesting to someone, share thoughts with people of similar interests, and save your memories for eternity (without the fear of your brother’s snooping on your silly ramblings!). Is the experience liberating? I think so, or else there wouldn’t be so many bloggers!

I’ve been thinking about the diaries that I’ve thumbed through while growing up: Anne Frank, Samuel Pepys, Che Gueira, and admired those weird designs in Da Vinci’s diaries. We got a secret glimpse of intimate lives of these writers without their knowledge. Maybe that’s the charm, the voyeuristic pleasure! But in yester years diaries were written in the cloistered crevices of personal space, without a soul flitting in the mindscape to taint the trajectory of thoughts. Imagine Anne Frank blogging, or Che Gueira punching a laptop in Cuban forest! But my assumption is that blogging is like writing a diary. Well, what if it is not?!

Seema, that’s what I think you could be doing: reflecting on the process of presenting yourself to the world, which in turn affects the way you see yourself. Blogging, like any other human activity, is mainly a performance. It’s enmeshed in veritable realities of life: need for identification, comparative evaluation of our intimate thoughts, use of a colonial language, engaging with comments of strangers, techno-dependency... the list can go on. You can make these complexities work for you or work against you. You can be a straw floating downstream, or a trout dancing upstream!

If not anything, this time the whole world is watching, literally!!!

Good luck,
Ravi

Thursday, October 06, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, by the way, the first comment in here could be a bot, spam that makes you click on the link hidden behind the word "writers". Just ignore such spam.

Ravi

Thursday, October 06, 2005  
Blogger Seema said...

Post modern indulgence indeed.'Trajectory','colonial language','techno-dependency','trajectory' & blah jargon.Ladies & Gentlemen,please clap for Dr.Ravi.Sahee ja raha hai Ravi.Keep it up;-).Hoping to see more of you.

Saturday, October 08, 2005  
Blogger Ron said...

hmmm...i got extremely senti on my last day at work...sent a lot of senti bye bye mails to colleagues across India..sniffled goodbye to friends in office (ok ok..exaggeration...i dnt sniffle...) but then i went to cal and forgot all abt work...
hv joined new office btw...76 is here..but am proud to report that im not letting it bother me. update ur space soon child
PS: is this ravi our ravi frm HCU? is u are..hello there..if ur not well sorry :-)

Thursday, October 20, 2005  
Blogger Ron said...

y must ravi talk like one of pavvys classes on ur blog?? Ravi dear this is a rather informal blog....pls pls dnt give lectures on post modern phenomenas no....email seema...u see other ppl read the comments as well...n well..i feel vry ignorant n stressed out after trying to decipher ur comment...
sorry to be using ths as a platform to talk to ravi seema..am sure u understand.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005  
Blogger Seema said...

Don't you know Ron,Ravi is Pavvy in the making.An Abacus version of Pentium Pavvy.We are moving backwards here.But anyway,I must admit,he makes things sound high-funda.
Lets see more of Ravi.

Friday, October 28, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Seema,
That's great - and u know wot I felt something very similar to this when I went for the party at Leo Meridian - my team party - I thought that was my last party(you know wot I was contemplating then..so...)and feeling all emotional....... but am still here - and probably that's will happen with you.

Hey - ravi's really "high funda" man...he made me feel so incapable about my language - he fits the print media!!! Cool guy!

Tuesday, November 01, 2005  
Blogger Seema said...

Yes Imran,Ravi is real high funda stuff.He is doing his Phd and all.So he better be high funda.I had a few fictional stories that he wrote.If I find them,then shall publish them on the blog.They were real interesting.

Sunday, November 06, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ok i finally know tht u r who i think u r ..... so i can safely say who i am... lol...

interesting blog.... dint mean to intrude.. just happened to bump into it....

kalyani

Monday, February 06, 2006  

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